In fact, most people think I don't eat. They say, "Oh Boofle doesn't eat anything. He is only a stuffed dog!"
Wrong.
Well, half wrong.
I am a dog. But I am not quite sure what they mean by "stuffed"? How can I be "stuffed" if I don't eat?
Anyway, I DO eat.
In fact, I love to eat.
I guess I am what you call a "foodie."
A foodie is someone who likes to try different foods and really gets into their texture, flavor and consistency. They like to rate foods on scales of 1 to 10. They like to savor flavors, swirl beverages around in their mouths and nibble on fine delicacies. They sniff and lick.
I like to sniff and lick. It's not usually food, but I am a very good sniffer and licker! I have to admit, I don't do the mouth swirling thing very well. My tongue gets in the way and I usually just end up drooling all over myself. I can rate foods though! I once had this older woman outside of Walmart offer me a handful of Dog Chow. I felt bad saying no, so I took one kibble and then spit it out on to the pavement as I walked away. Some crow swooped down and gobbled it up. Poor thing. I would rate that kibble as a NEGATIVE 100. Yuck!
This other time, I was hiding under a table at an Italian cafe and a scrap of chicken fell right into my lap. I swear this chicken tasted like filet mignon. It.It was moist and delicious and tender and I almost fell into a trance right there under the table. The two ladies who were enjoying dinner above me didn't see me, but one accidentally kicked me and it brought me out of my food haze. Thank God she was wearing Adidas running shoes and not cowboy boots or she would have broken my rib. Anyway, that chicken I would rate a 10. I would give it more points, but foodies know you have to stick to the rating scale of 1 through 10. Unless you're eating day old kibble out of a woman's hand outside of Walmart.
As a foodie, I enjoy foods from a variety of cultures. My favorite is Mexican food. I love how you can just wrap a tortilla around cheese and beans and rice and then give it a different name depending on how you fold it. It's all good to me. I carry around a little tiny jar of Cholula just in case I run into a taco stand I can't resist.
I also like Thai food. Pad Thai is my favorite. I usually get it with chicken, but I also like the shrimp. The only probably with the shrimp is that if you don't finish it all and take it to go, it doesn't taste as good the next day. It seems to get "fishier" over night. One morning I had leftover Shrimp Pad Thai and I swear it smelled like I had just scraped it out of the bottom of a ancient fishing boat. It was pretty stinky. It smelled a little bit like Fluffy's breath. She's the cat who lives next door to me who eats tuna for breakfast.
I also like Italian food, but I am not really into pasta. I mainly go for the wine and the tapas. I am not exactly sure what the word "tapas" means but I think it means "YUMMY." It's the food you get before you get your food. You know, like hors d'oeuvres? I love how you have food before you have food. I wonder what kind of wine they serve before the wine? Maybe I should ask the next time I am at an Italian restaurant.Well, I better go. I have a reservation at a fancy restaurant tonight. Hot date. There's going to be live music, candles, wooden tables and these great big crystal chandeliers hanging from the ceiling. If I have too much wine, you may find me swinging from one! Woohooooooooooooooooooooo! Look at me! I'm Booooooooofle the Foooooooodie!
Eat up my friends!
Love,
Boofle
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